The Veil To The Holy of Holies (July 2006)

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High [El Elohim the Most High God who is Creator and Possessor of the heavens and the earth] will rest with the Almighty [Jehovah, the I AM]. ~Ps 91:1

The Ancient of Days, God Almighty, King over all the earth is seated in His Temple. His throne of flaming sapphire fills the heavens and the earth is merely a footstool. Majestic seraphim are calling to each other in mighty voices that shake the vast temple, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty, the whole earth is full of His glory”. The glory of God radiates from Him with brilliant color like a rainbow, His holiness a river of cleansing fire that pours from before His throne. His eyes are like blazing embers and He see all things. Thunder and lightning peal around Him. The heavens and the earth quake in His presence. This is the Most High God, who is above time and space, who was before all things and has created all things.

And man built a temple on earth to worship this Creator God and in this temple there was only one place where the full glory of His Spirit could reside, so that sinful man was not struck dead by His presence. It was called the Holy of Holies. A huge curtain, several feet thick, blocked entry to this glorious and terrifying place and only one man, the High Priest, was allowed to enter once a year with sacrifices and blood to plead for the sake of man. Any man that stood in front of this blazing Holiness without atonement for their sin would be struck dead.

But one dark day, as the earth trembled and the sun lost its light, the invisible, mighty hand of God took hold of the massive veil and ripped it from top to bottom. Why? To unleash the His splendor and the might of His Spirit among mankind to strike them dead?

No, for Jehovah loved those He created in His image, and though He knew man was too unholy to stand in presence, He longed to be united in relationship with him above all things. And so He sent His Son Jesus Christ to earth to be the perfect atoning sacrifice for the sins of man. On that dark day when Jesus was sacrificed on the cross of Golgotha, He became the new veil through which all of mankind would have to enter in order to stand in the presence of the Most High God.

Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith. ~Hebrews 10:19-22

Through faith in what Jesus’ sacrifice and His resurrection has done for you, you are brought into the Holy of Holies, into the glorious presence of God Almighty. In fact, you are now the new Holy of holies through the veil of the broken body of Jesus Christ who lives in you. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit of God, who is in you? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. ~1 Cor 6:1
He has removed the barrier so that we live continually in the presence of God and His Spirit could live in us. He invites you not only to enter but to abide, to live there.

Your new access is not to be taken lightly. Jesus, One with God, the perfect and holy Deity in the form of man, hung on that cross and took on all the sin, guilt, pain and suffering that ever had been, ever was or ever would be from the four corners of the world so that you could live in God’s presence and so that He could live in you and with you. Jesus, who had never known sin, became your sin and bore God’s full judgment for that sin, as a sacrifice for you. He gave up everything to bring you this life.

You now dwell in the shadow of God.
God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus. ~Eph 2:6
You are now seated with Jesus in the very presence of the Almighty, the I AM. He who IS – above time and space and yet everywhere at once, ruling the forces of the universe, He created all things and by Him everything holds together. And this Divine Being wants to be united in relationship with you, His creation. The magnitude of this Truth should make everything else on this earth fall away – knowing that at every moment this Presence is in you and with you and that you dwell continually in this presence only by the broken body and blood of His Divine and perfect Son, Jesus Christ.

We often think of God as the El Elohim, our Father in heaven, our Provider who is at a distance, that we need to go to or that we dial up in prayer when we need Him. But He has called Himself the “I AM that I AM”, the “I will be that I will be”, the “I AM with you”. He is the origin, the source, the absolute, unchanging personal God who is ever near. And circumstance does not change it because this is truth regardless of where you find yourself or what is happening around you. Your focus does not change it because you are often focused on things of the world and not on His presence and His Being. Your feelings do not change it because even if you cannot feel His presence, He is the omnipresent God who is over all and dwells in you. Your frustration and doubt cannot change the absolute truth of who He is, worthy of our focus and praise forever.

He has promised us “Behold I AM with you always.” He is I AM. He is not I AM living outside of your world or the I AM living afar. He is not the I WAS who dwelt on earth long ago or the I WILL BE when you decide to see Me or need Me or when I decide to grace you with my divine presence. No He is for us I AM, always. At every moment the glorious Deity of deities who once resided behind a massive curtain in the Holy of holies now resides in your world, with you and in you. You don’t have to go try to find Him, you don’t have to plead for His presence. He has promised it always. Wherever you are, even if it doesn’t feel true, it is His promise that this is where you dwell and you are always free to turn your eyes to His throne, to the splendor of His face and His omiscient strength. No matter where you go, how you feel or what is happening, you are hidden with Christ in the throne room of the Most High God.

Look ever to Jehovah and His strength; seek his face always [continually]. ~Ps 105:4

- by Julene Renee Warren (July 20, 2006)

His Life (June 6, 2006)

I was talking to my friend Becky tonight about being a light in a sea of darkness. About being vessels in which the radiant presence of God lives and reaches out to the darkness in lives of people that we meet throughout the day. She talked about how she was struck on Sunday about what a great gift God has given us, eternity to live in communion as a family in His kingdom with Him. But we don’t believe it. We look at our lives like we only have this time, these few decades, when in reality we have all of eternity. But God only has this time, these few decades, to grow His kingdom through us. We think life is short so use the time wisely, that we need make it count for God but that’s the wrong perspective. This life is not ours, that is why God has given us new life in eternity. Our life on earth is God’s and He only has these few years to use it.

Why do we go forward in our day thinking it’s our day and ask God to be with us in it? Why not let God use this day for His purpose and His kingdom? What would we give up by stepping aside and letting His life fill us and reach out to those around us? What would we lose by letting the awesome power and love and majesty of the Almighty Sovereign Creator and Savior of the world touch His creation through us? Isn’t this an incredible privilege? What an honor to be His light in the middle of the dark world. I look at it and I realize that all I would be giving up is a mediocre life that is stuck in a semi-comfortable rut. I would give up a life that is like everybody else’s, for a life that was different and radiant and noticeable, that could change the world around me by letting Him work through me. Where am I noticeably different right now? I work and live and play and talk like everybody else. Why doesn’t my life make a difference? Do I really think that this is it, this is what my life on this earth is about and then I’ll go to heaven and enjoy my eternity? No! My life on earth is not mine – Jesus came to take this life and transform it into His purpose to build His kingdom as He sees fit. I get up in the morning and I think this day is mine and I’ll just go through the motions of work, get home and maybe enjoy some time at home or some relaxation, work towards a better career, a better house. How will that make a difference? This is the only life of mine God can use on this earth for His great purpose. This is the reason He put His life into me and left me here instead of immediately taking me to heaven when I became a Christian. Each day is a small piece of this purpose, of His light piercing into the lives of the world around me. And when this life is done and He has used all He can, then I have all of eternity to spend with Him.

Tonight I had this revelation. Tomorrow will I get up and see my world differently? Tomorrow will I get up and see my role differently? Tomorrow will I get up and see my life as His to use, the only life He has, a few short years for Him to move mightily in the lives around me? Tomorrow will I get up and know that in me is His light? Tomorrow will I get up and give up my mediocre, useless plans so that His light, life, love, power can shine brilliantly into the pain and darkness of people’s hearts and lives around me? Tomorrow will I know that I have been given more than one life to live, I have been given eternity, but God only has this life to live through me to make a difference? I pray that I will know this in my heart and let God live this life through me, tomorrow and every day for the rest of this life.

- By Julene Renee Warren (June 2006)
Inspired by a conversation with Becky Stock about her life-changing realizations as she visited Italy, particularly Florence.

White As Snow (January 2006)

Soft flakes float silently down, covering the world in a peaceful blanket of white.
It feels like a whole new world. How beautiful it is to walk in.

The dingy, rough, hard surfaces that were here yesterday are transformed into soft white silhouettes.

The harsh sounds of a busy world are hushed by the whirling fluffy flakes that settle over it all, bringing peaceful tranquility.

Night falls but the gleaming white snow holds back the blackness and even the shadows glow softly blue as the snow reflects any hint of light.

White as snow –

God promised this for us when we are cleansed by His grace. As I watch the effects of a winter snowfall, I see it’s about more than a color.

Through the covering of the blood of Christ over our soul, we are a whole new creation and our world has changed. The old has gone, the new has come. How beautiful it is to walk in this grace.

The hardness in our stubborn, unclean hearts and minds is transformed and softened with His love and righteousness.

The harsh clamor of Satan’s lies and the worries of the world are hushed by His quiet peace that brings rest to our soul.

The brightness of His Light in us holds back the darkness that seeks to overwhelm us as the nights of trials and suffering fall, and even the shadows glow with His glory.

For He has cleansed us and though our sins were as scarlet, we are white as snow.

- By Julene Renee Warren (January 2006)
One day I walked out into a beautiful winter snowfall and started thinking about God’s promises in Isaiah 1:18 and Psalm 51:7.

King of Glory (Christmas 2005)

The King is coming.

Throughout the ages the prophets have foretold His coming, from generation to generation. The King of glory shall come...

Who is this King of glory?

He is the Lord Almighty.

He established the heavens as His throne and the earth as His footstool from the beginning of time. He established them and they are His. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

He sits on His throne and His train fills the heavens. A river of fire flows from before Him. His eyes are blazing fire and on his head are many crowns. He bears the name King of kings and Lord of lords. Holy is the Lord Almighty.

He has all authority, glory and sovereign power over creation. His dominion is an everlasting dominion that will not pass away, and his kingdom is one that will never be destroyed.

The heavens are full of His glory and the earth trembles at His coming. He moves on the clouds of heaven.

He dwells in a High and Holy place, where only those with pure hearts can stand.

This is the King of glory that shall come… it was foretold in the prophecies of old. This King was to come from His heavenly throne to earth to rule as our Holy High Priest and King with perfect righteousness, justice and peace.

This King of glory has come. This King is the Prince of Peace and His dominion over all the earth, and the hearts of men, will last forever

But He did not come on the clouds of heaven. The heavens trembled and the angels sang … but only over a small field to a handful of unholy shepherds.

This King, the ruler of eternity came... as a tiny baby … born to men … born in a stable … in the village of Bethlehem.

This King came to judge with perfect righteousness and justice …
then gave His Life so that subjects of His holy wrath will be saved from His judgment.

This King came as the High Priest to build His glorious and holy temple to be His dwelling …
but He does not seek to establish His throne on the vast heavens, but in broken hearts of fallible people …

The prophecies foretelling His coming do not end with His arrival on earth. They tell of a King who is coming as the Branch that is to bear fruit, the Priest who will build His temple so that people may worship Him, the ultimate Sacrificial Lamb who was sent as a ransom to free captives, the Prince of Peace who would heal and save His people. The prophecies are fulfilled only when the King takes His rightful throne in His temple, over His kingdom, in the house that He establishes.

This King of Glory who lives forever, whose name is Holy, says -:
”I live in a High and Holy place…
and I also live with those who are broken and humble in spirit.
Those who humble themselves and turn to Me, I will heal them. I will guide them and comfort them, creating praise on their lips. I will restore peace and live with them and be their King."

The King of glory calls us, you and me, to be the fulfillment of the prophecy.

We are His kingdom and our hearts are His throne.
We are His royal priesthood and our hearts are His temple.
We are the people whom He called out of darkness and wrath to His kingdom of Light and Life to praise Him, worship Him and receive Him as our King.

The King of glory has come, humbly, in a manger, seeking humble hearts of people who realize they need what He offers – His deliverance, His righteousness and His peace.

Open up you gates that the King of glory might come in and establish His throne.

- By Julene Renee Warren (December 24, 2005)

Christmas Carols (December 2005)

‘Tis the Season of Celebrating

We love Christmas carols. Fond memories of our childhood, they get us in the “Christmas spirit”. We hear them every year at this time but do we stop to listen to their powerful message?

Their message is simple yet profound: God, the Creator of all things, the Almighty Ruler of the universe came to us, to live with us and bring us Life!

Imagine it… As the Creator came to earth was all of Creation set on edge? Were the heavens and earth trembling as even the rocks longed to cry out when they heard the first cry of the Promise and His Light broke forth?

Did every soul feel some prick of expectation as its Desire and Purpose descended?

The skies parted in dazzling light and hallowed angels rushed to the earth from their place at the Throne of the Almighty to proclaim this wonderful thing that was happening!

Imagine it …

The writers of these carols did. Listen to what they say. Picture the enormity of this wonderful, impossible, amazing act of God. Picture it as though you hear for the first time.

Let your soul feel it and rejoice …

- By Julene Renee Warren (December 2005)

Do Not Conform (Nov 2005)

“Therefore I urge you brothers in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship.

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:1, 2

How do I know God’s will? How do I know where God is leading me? How do I know what He wants for me? How do I live for Him and do His will? How do I even desire His will?

Christians ask this all the time and the answer is in this verse. Surprisingly simple but it seems to be so hard to practice. We find it in worship – true worship. In these verses, our worship is not just in going to church and singing songs, not just in spending time in meditation and prayer. Our one act of worship that encompasses all the rest, the way God wants us to worship Him in response to His glory and grace, is to be willing to give ourselves to Him – our body, our actions, our thoughts, our life - to be holy and pleasing for His purpose and His glory. Have you truly worshipped God? You can sing all the songs you want with great passion, you can meditate on God’s word but after that, day to day, going to work or school, being with your friends and family, believers or not, have you truly worshipped Him? He created you specifically for His purpose. He created you and loved you and died for you and saved you, so that He could live with you and through you – on earth and in eternity. Your act of worship in response for all He has done is to give yourself to that purpose. Because it is not about you. You are here only because He wills it.

It’s hard. We live in a society of distraction. People are running from the truth and there is so much to pull us away. There is a torrent of lies, misconceptions, fun, needs and distractions that pull us away from His purposes. In order to truly worship Him by giving ourselves to Him, we need to stop living for the things of the world and thinking the way that they do and running after what the world tells us is important, the temporary fix. We need to re-focus and start thinking His way. Being transformed Paul calls it – the same word used for metamorphosis – like a caterpillar turning into a butterfly.

I don’t know how to do this. In fact, when I think of the task of being in this world and not conforming to this society that pushes us to conform to its standards everyday, I think of the Red Mile. During the 2004 NHL Playoffs, the Calgary Flames hockey team was on fire. The celebration centre for their wins was located within a 5-10 block area on 17th Avenue downtown Calgary called the Red Mile. After the games, fans would stream from their houses, pubs, restaurants, clubs, the Saddledome to celebrate on 17th Ave.

I made the mistake of going down there one night. As we poured onto the Red Mile with tens of thousands of other fans, we got caught in a celebrating mob of people that carried us along. The crowd got thicker and thicker until there was nowhere to move. We couldn’t fight our way out of it, there were too many people, there was too much force and we were carried along with the crowd. I lost sight of my husband and my friends as they got pulled away by the throng and there seemed to be nothing I could do and I began to panic. I wanted to scream but in the throng of screaming, celebrating fans I wouldn’t be heard. I tried to turn around to find my husband and my friends but I couldn’t. I tried to stop and get out but I was pushed from every side.

Being transformed in my mind, not going along with the crowd, not conforming … to me it feels as impossible as it would have been to stop in the middle of that pushing mob, turn around and then go against them. It seems as useless as trying to walk against the force of a throng. How would I do it? I can’t. I’ve been trying. I desire to give myself to knowing God and His purposes, to live for Him. In fact I often tell Him I will and believe it with all my heart. But I get torn away from that purpose by unending distractions and lies. I can’t seem to control it, I can’t keep fighting it and I get so discouraged. I want to STOP! How can I turn around and walk daily against the patterns of this world with this incredible torrent against me?

“I always keep the Lord in front of me. When He is by my side, I cannot be moved. That is why my heart is glad and my body rejoices. My body rests securely.” Psalms 16:8, 9

This is the answer, but Lord, how do I keep You in front of me? I know that You can easily walk against the torrent and I can too if I am following You. With You protecting me and being my Rock I cannot be moved. I can rest with You in front of me, knowing you have fought the torrent and I don’t have to. But practically how is this lived out? Unfortunately I can’t physically have You in front of me through the day. I lose sight of You and I get pulled away again time after time.

As I think about my frustration, I see that my problem is that I expect an immediate, obvious change. The answer is in the verses above but the effects are not immediate, in fact I will struggle as long as I am in this body on this earth. We war against the flesh and the desires of the flesh. Unfortunately this nature is inside us and a part of us and we are constantly at war with it. As Paul said in Romans, we do the things we do not want to do, and things we want to do, those we cannot seem to do. It is not an overnight change; it is a lifetime change that will only be fully realized in eternity.

This struggle makes us stronger in our faith in God and in our understanding of Him. A transformation of the mind happens eventually, one area at a time - our actions begin to change, our reactions begin to change, our feelings begin to change, our heart changes and our mind changes. It happens slowly as we consciously keep the Lord and His Word and His Truth and His Light ahead of us and we begin to be different. His ways become a part of us. Slowly. So hold fast, each day put Him in front, each time you realize during the day that you have been pulled away from Him, take a moment to consciously re-align yourself with where He is, and you will realize that He is turning you.

Down the road, you can look back and see where He has taken you and how you have changed. Don’t expect to make giant movements against the surge of distraction and worldly desires. Don’t expect that you won't be pulled back from time to time either. You will have to do it one step at a time, holding fast to God. Re-aligning yourself to where He is and where He wants you to be renews you and eventually transforms you. Being willing to follow Him, to be renewed in your thoughts and actions, to give yourself to Him in obedience of His direction, is our daily worship. And this will transform us.

- Julene Renee Warren

Jesus Washes His Disciples' Feet (Sept 1997)

John 13:1-17

And God stood.

Heaven was within reach. This was His final hour. The evil forces of hell were being loosed to take on the Son of Man and the destiny of His creation hung in the balance.

He looked lovingly into each of the faces in the room. After creating the heavens and the earth, the mountains, trees, flowers and every living creature for His own, He then created His children. With joy He had breathed His own life into dust and formed mankind.

But He was no longer in the throne room of heaven and His masterpieces were now being destroyed and held captive by sin. For these He was about to go to battle. He had become one of them and now stood among those twelve ordinary men who had been destined for this time. He who was about to take their place in death to win their victory, longed to show them the extent of His love and teach them in these final hours they had together.

His dying arrogant creation sitting in the very presence of the Ancient of Days had just been arguing over who was the greatest among them. Now they turned their eyes toward Him. “Who is the greatest?” He asked, humbly removing His outer garment. “Is not the one who sits at the table greater than the servant?”

And God knelt.

The Ruler of the universe became a servant. With all the love and power of heaven spilling over into His every movement, He washed the dirt and grime from the feet of those seated at the table.

The stains that had clung from walking through the world were removed by the hands of the Anointed One. The same hands that had created all things. The same hands that in a few hours would bear the nails of crucifixion as He hung between heaven and hell to cleanse the stains from the calloused hearts of mankind.

Twenty-four feet were washed that night. Those of a man who would, in the face of opposition, deny ever knowing this One he knew to be the Son of God. Those of the ten who would soon run from His side out of fear of where it might lead them.

And as He moved to wash those of the betrayer, His heart broke. Knowing the coming betrayal and loss of one of His creation, He mercifully reached out in perfect love with another chance. A choice to be cleansed. But Judas had already chosen the deceiving hiss of the evil one and his heart hardened, closing forever to this amazing love of God.

Tears mingled with the water as the Creator washed His ruined creation, as the King of kings served His faithless servants, as a holy God showed a love in which He would humbly give Himself to make the unholy holy.

And He does the same for you.

Where is it that you stand? Do you stand with the one who denied his Savior, ashamed of your faith, fearful of opposition? Or do you wear the sandals of those who left the side of Jesus, choosing your own way, afraid of where His path leads? Or is it the unbelieving, hard-hearted way of the betrayer that you follow? I know we have walked the path of at least one of these and we will again.

Now come stand with me before the holy gaze of the One who knows our hearts. We were created to be children of this loving King, but we are ruled by our selfishness and turning from Him choose to serve our sin instead. And then wretched captive, we’ve taken it even further. I show you my own blood stained hands. For it was us, you and me, who put our loving Creator on that cross. Our rebellion pierced that hands that served in love. And after He won the victory over our sin and death, we dare come before Him and seek forgiveness?

Look at your feet, search your own soul, what do you see?

You faithless one … no, who am I to judge, you know your heart. Look at my feet. They are stained. I traveled with the world. Again I was faithless. I was proud. I was selfish and chose not to follow Christ but to follow Satan’s desires. I turned my back on the Savior God who gave Himself for me. I denied Him as the Lord of my life, who loved me, whose death I caused, who went to battle for me, who wants me to follow Him to victory. Faithless one, what have you done?

And God stands.

He who knit you from dust and searches your heart and mind.

And God kneels.

“Unless I wash you,” He says, “you have no part of me.” So with all the love and power of heaven spilling over into every touch, He reaches out His nail-pierced hands with another chance. He washes each stain from your world weary feet. Oh unworthy one, you speck of dust, lift your head and look into His face. Let His love pour into your soul. See the delight in His eyes as He makes the unholy holy.

Go now and do likewise.

Do you see those also stained with the filth of the world? Go now and serve them. Offer cleansing for their feet. Do you see those faithless ones who also follow their own empty ways? Go now and serve them. Show them the One who is faithful and true. Do you see those who are still captive? Go now and serve them. Show them that there is victory.

And those whose hands drip with the blood of evil, remember whose blood stained your hands, and show them His forgiveness.

Is a servant greater than his Master? No, a servant must follow his Master. This is the urging of our God in His final hour. He told us, “If you love me, you will obey My commands and My command is this: To love one another as I have loved you.” How boundless is His love, how gracious, how merciful, how forgiving. Love as He loves, serve as He serves, give as He gives and forgive as He forgives you. It may mean denial, it may mean pain, it may mean loneliness – but who are we, faithless servants, to say that we are greater than our Master who loved us enough to suffer all of it and more for us.

“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.”

It is Jesus who washes your world weary feet, your Ruler who gave Himself as your servant.

Stand before Him, see His boundless love.
And with gratitude, humbly kneel before Him in service.

- By Julene Renee Olson (September 3, 1997)

Spontaneous Prayer ( August 1997)

I am the sacrifice.
May the holy fire of Your Spirit
consume me Lord.

Burn out the dross.
Make me pleasing incense –
With the sweet fragrance of Your love and presence.

As Your Spirit fills me
May You be all in me
I want You, Lord,
Only You!

Lord I am a living sacrifice.
I offer You all I have.
I lay it on the altar.

My sin has saturated me,
But send Your consuming fire
To show You are God of my life.
I am Yours – for Your glory
I want to be all for You, all consumed by You
I want to be all You want me to be.
Heart, soul, mind and strength
Completely, wholly
Abandoned…

- By Julene Renee Olson (August 18, 1997)
Prayer during a sermon on the fire consuming Elijah’s sacrifice (1 Kings 18:16-45)

Fear vs. Love (June 1996)

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear…” 1 John 4:18
“So do not fear, I am with you.” Isaiah 41:10
“…because God is love.” 1 John 4:8

I am afraid.

What do I fear?
I fear the future.
I fear people.
I fear relationships.
I fear situations which I cannot control.
Why do I fear?

“You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Matthew 8:26
God loves you.

Yeah, I know.

No you don’t understand. God loves you!

Yeah, I know.

No, you have no idea.
His love for you is perfect and perfect love drives out fear. And yet you fear.
Do you not understand? You cannot understand for you doubt His love and you fear.
If you truly understood how much the Almighty loves you, you would never fear.
Don’t you realize you are in His hands, so why are you afraid? Why does that scare you?
HE LOVES YOU!
HE GAVE HIS ALL FOR YOU! YOU EXIST FOR HIM!
HE CAN MOVE HEAVEN AND EARTH FOR YOU!
HE LOVES YOU!
And still you fear, for you do not know His love.
I pray for you as Paul prayed for the Ephesians, that you would know how wide and high and deep the love is that God has for us and the power that is in that love. For if you truly understood it, you would realize there is NO FEAR IN HIS LOVE!

May I know His love and may it amaze me.

- By Julene Renee Olson (June 1996)

Cow Story (May 1996)

I am a cow.

I was once told a story about a cow. She’s a regular cow, a beef cow. She lives on a farm in Minnesota. Her life is pretty routine, mostly feeding in the pasture. But one day she lay down… and didn’t get back up. For two weeks she laid there beside the shed despite all kinds of pulling, prodding, yelling and whatever else the farmer tried to do to get her up. She just didn’t think she could get up, nor did she want to.

I don’t remember the end of the story – if she got up on her own or if they had to use a hoist. I do remember however, that my Uncle Dale, a dairy farmer, laughed when he heard that story. He knows all too well the stubbornness of cows. He wasn’t surprised by the story; in fact he had experienced it himself. For whatever reason, a cow will decide they can’t get back up after they have lain down. They may have tried once and decided it was impossible. The only way to get them back on their feet is to hoist them up until they realize that they do have legs under them to stand on after all.

“Cows,” he commented, “are a dumb animal, but they are one of the toughest. They can survive things that another animal, like a horse, even a strong one, wouldn’t survive.”

Now I love horses. Give me a beautiful horse over a cow any day. I would love to be able to compare myself to a horse – with their spirit, grace, beauty, alertness, intelligence, the ease at which they fly over obstacles and the sheer strength of their rippling muscles under their glossy coat.

But no, I’m much more like a cow. Dumb and stubborn. I find myself down and when I try half-heartedly to get up, I can’t. So I sit and sulk and I pity myself because I can’t get back up and I don’t even want to try. I stubbornly wallow in the manure and dirt while God keeps prodding me with promises, encouragement or trials. But I turn my big head, blink at him with large unseeing eyes, lick the snot out of my nose and keep wallowing in my self pity and wounded pride. I can’t get up.

All too often, I make God come in with a hoist and lift up my stubborn, lazy, self-pitying bulk until I realize I do have legs to stand on after all. And it happens again and again. I don’t learn.

Yes, I am a cow.

- By Julene Renee Olson (May 27, 1996)

Jesus (Christmas 1995)

As morning hues of the Christmas dawn
Cast their brilliance upon the snow,
The family wakens merry and bright
And straight to their stockings they go.
The previous eve brought quite a bounty
Of food and treasures and laughter.
Even though the hours of sleep had been few,
Their joy still shone the morning after.
So now with the gifts all opened
And the memories still fresh in their mind,
More gifts have your stockings bulging,
But my children –what have you done with Mine?
I know you know what I mean,
It’s the reason for all this fun.
But somehow in the chaos I’m forgotten.
Do I need to remind you of my Son?

“THOU SHALT CALL HIS NAME JESUS…”

The weary girl bends her head to look at the smooth red face of her tiny newborn snuggled in her arms, and whispering his name, she kisses his face… the face of the Most High God.

“… JESUS…”

The helpless being that had found life and had grown and stirred inside her, had Himself knit her together – body, soul and mind – and had created and ordained all the days of all mankind.

“… JESUS…”

The wailing infant who latched onto her for food and turned teary eyes to her for comfort is the Almighty… He provided food for all living creatures and has all power and authority over everything from the tiny spider in the corner of the stable to the billions of stars welcoming Him overhead.

“… JESUS…”

Through moist eyes she watches the few humble shepherds and out of place foreigners kneel in awe to worship her baby son lying in a feedbox… Her King who will sit on the mighty throne of the universe while we, and all of His creation, fall to our knees at the power of His name.

“… JESUS…”

She was chosen to suffer shame, rejection and pain to bring Him into the world… and now He has been chosen to suffer all of these, along with temptation, torture and death to bring all who believe in His name into eternal Paradise.

“… JESUS…”

He who with one glance brings the strongholds of hell to its knees in abject horror and whose holy vengeance strikes terror into the heart of a fleeing Satan, searches your heart and your life… He sees your selfishness, your sin, your disobedience… and then takes it all on Himself to offer us holiness through the sacrifice of His blood.

“… JESUS…”

The Eternal Glory who had no beginning and has always been, whose power and authority has no limit, chose to stay on that cross and die in your place… and as Satan rejoiced in the triumph of the death of God Himself, Christ took away all his authority by rising from the dead, with the ultimate victory.

“… JESUS…”

The victorious Savior of the world crushed all of Satan’s power and defeated the hold of sin and death that destroys mankind and then hands His incredible victory to us to accept and claim as our own, to become beloved children of our merciful Father, and when Christ returns in all His glory, to share in the splendor of His kingdom forever.

“THOU SHALT CALL HIS NAME JESUS…”
The Name that is above every name!

“…FOR HE SHALL SAVE HIS PEOPLE FROM THEIR SIN.”
There is no other name under heaven by which you can be saved.

You have received many gifts this Christmas, but Child, what have you done with Mine?

- By Julene Renee Olson (Christmas 1995)

The Lord Will Provide (Summer 1995)

Abraham called to sacrifice Isaac.
Genesis 22:1-18 “So Abraham called that place ‘The Lord Will Provide’. And to this day it is said, ‘On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.’” (v. 14)

God provided a Lamb for the sacrifice.

Lying upon the altar, bound and tied with the hopelessly unbreakable cords of your sin, destined for a burning death. As the dagger is lifted above your heart, the blade flashes with the fire of the sun.

The words of your father echo in your mind, “God Himself with provide a lamb.” The promise of an only son, God’s covenant of blessing, a call to faith.

You squeeze your eyes shut and your body tenses, paralyzed with the fear and dread of inescapable agony. What seems like an eternity passes and then …
… the soft bleating of sheep? Your eyes open at the unexpected, yet welcome sound and turning your head you see the young ram, caught in the thorn bushes, gentle pained eyes watching you.

The lamb. “God will provide.”

But surely this can’t be the Lamb promised by your Father. This is only a humble young ram caught in a thicket – dirty scratched and full of briers. Blood is caked on His face from the thorns piercing His head.

The look on your Father’s face tells you that indeed this is His Lamb of promise. With love in His eyes and tears on His cheeks, He gently lifts you off the altar and sets you on the soft grass to witness the sacrifice.

A death that should be yours.

Taking off the cords that had held you in bondage, He places the ram on the altar and binds Him tightly with the wretchedness of your sin, your sorrows, your guilt, your shame. Your breath catches in your throat seeing the pain in your Father’s eyes, but when He looks at you, the pain turns to love and He gives you a promising smile. You watch in wonder as the dagger is again poised but this time, it is over the heart of the Lamb.

The entire universe is hushed. The sun loses its light. The demons of hell wait in jubilant expectancy while the angels of heaven hold their breath in heart wrenching dread.

The Father turns His face in utter grief.

And the blade plunges deep into the heart of Jesus Christ.

“Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world.” (John 1:29)

“He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all – how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:32)

The Lord will provide.

- By Julene Renee Olson (Summer 1995)

Wounded Soldier (March 1995)

An agonized cry cut through the blackness.
A pain so intense, as it pierces his heart,
that it sends the young soldier staggering to his knees.
His vision is blurred.
His mind is spinning in confusion.
Once again, he felt defeat
Once again, there was failure
yet this time had left him wounded.
And the enemy continued to target him,
trying to destroy any life left in his broken body.
In helplessness and fear, he cries out to his King:

“Oh Father, when will it stop?
I can’t fight anymore – I am so tired.
I am weak and have failed You once again.
Oh King eternal, fight for me.
What more can I do? I am only a child.
My heart is broken, I am bleeding,
The pain has left me helpless.
Father You promised never to leave or forsake me in battle.
You promised rest to those of us who trust in You.
You promised strength to those of us who are weak.
My Lord, You promised to guide me and protect me.
You promised You would help me in the fight
but now I am defeated,
a weak and wounded soldier.”

And as the tears of pain flow down my face
You whisper through the noise and darkness:
“Do not be afraid. I love you Child.
Trust in Me. Raise your shield.”
With a weak and unsteady hand I lift my shield.
Strengthened by Your hand the attacks are blocked.

Again Your voice urges me:
“Child, I have given you my sword.
Now use it as you have been told.”
With Your sword, strengthened by Your touch,
I am able to fight off the enemy.

And when the battle is over and won,
The great Physician, my loving Father, the King victorious,
gathers His wounded soldier into His mighty arms.
And with the gentle touch of His hand,
He heals my broken, aching heart,
then cleanses it
and fills it
with His love, joy and everlasting peace!
And so strengthening me,
He places me firmly back on my feet.
Father, You promised never to leave me or forsake me.
You have promised perfect rest to those who trust in You.
You promised to give strength to the weak.
My Lord, You promised to guide me and protect me.
You promised that You would help me fight!

In You is victory!
For when I am weak and wounded,
Almighty God,
It is then
that Your power is made perfect
And it then
that I am strong!

- By Julene Renee Olson (March 17, 1995)

Night-Time Meditations (January 1995)

I will lie down
and sleep in peace
For you alone, O Lord,
make me dwell
in safety.

I will lie silent before You Lord,
and know that You are my God.
I will search my heart before You,
and rest in Your precious love.
You are a mighty shield around me
the light of Your holy face shines upon me.
You have given me Your peace,
and in You O Lord I will put my trust.

I will lie down
and sleep in peace
For you alone, O Lord,
make me dwell
in safety.

- By Julene Renee Olson (Jan 8, 1995)
Based on Psalm 4:8

Dear Friend (April 1994)

Memories…

Brought upon by a word,
by a song, by a thought

Of a friendship
secured lovingly in Christ

Of laughter and tears
and of youthful dreams

Of your sweet support
the strength of your shoulder

And time has passed
tides have carried us apart

Leaving us with memories
and a never fading love

And with each letter
comes joy, a smile, perhaps a tear

And a hope of reunion
to laugh again, to talk again

To be together once again
to share dreams and lend a shoulder

But until then my friend
you will be in my thoughts
and in my prayers

And I will take times like these
to look back and remember …

- By Julene Renee Olson (April 13, 1994)


Beloved

I threw a penny in a fountain today
and wished a small prayer -
for God to guide your way.

I saw a star gleaming in tonight’s sky
and I wished us together –
with a soft, reflective sigh.

It’s in God’s faithful care
that my prayers leave you tonight.
For I know He will lead us
in the path that is right.

- By Julene Renee Olson (April 26, 1994)

Minnesota Winter (February 1994)

O Sovereign Lord, Merciful God,
Tonight I gaze upon Your creation
in wonder.

I see millions of stars,
Shining in the midnight expanse
of the heavens.

I see the glowing fullness of the moon,
Spilling its beams upon
the snow-covered earth

And the snow sparkles under the moonlit sky,
And the shadows gather in the hollows.

I see Your glory in the beauty of the universe,
And I feel Your Mighty Presence,
And I know that You are the Almighty – Jehovah,
And I am overwhelmed.

Lord who am I that You call me Your child?
That You knew me before I was born
And You knit me together
You formed me with love and a purpose.

Lord who am I that You call me Your friend?
That You care for me,
That You sent Your Son
Who gave His life in my stead
That I might live forever with You.

O Holy One,
Most Gracious Father,
To You be the glory and honor forever!

Amen.

- By Julene Renee Olson (Feb 15, 1994)
From my windowsill in Plymouth, Minnesota

Worship at Blue Rock (August 1993)

Like a rushing mountain river,
so O Lord is your infinite grace bestowed on me.
Like the clear sparkling mountain stream,
so O Lord is your love that refreshes my soul.
Like the mighty towering mountain peaks,
so O Lord is your awesome power and majesty.
Like the cool sweet mountain breeze,
so O Lord is your Spirit which rests my soul.

I praise your name O Most High God.
I praise You for this beauty,
which by Your almighty authority, You have created.
I praise You for Your majesty,
the power and glory which radiates from Your heavenly throne.
I praise You for Your holiness,
I am unworthy to even speak your holy name.
I praise You for Your amazing grace,
which allows me to come into Your glorious presence.
I praise You for Your Son, my Savior,
who is the perfect example of Your immeasurable love.
I praise You for Your Holy Spirit,
who empowers me to live for Your mighty kingdom.
I praise you for Your law,
which shows me how desperately I need You.
I praise You for Your Word,
which guides me in Truth and teaches me of Your greatness.
I worship You, my precious Father,
for calling me to be Your own dear child.
I bow before You now,
in humble reverence to Your sovereign Godliness.
Take me Lord, for I am Yours.

- by Julene Renee Olson (August 1993)
This was written on a large rock by a river in the mountains of Alberta, Canada. It was peaceful and bright. The breeze whispered through the trees and the river rushed by me, sparkling in the sun. Mountain peaks soared overhead and the majesty of it all was breathtaking. It showed me how amazing and awesome my God is and I wanted to try to express the praise and reverence I felt. His mighty presence in the beauty of His creation and His holiness overwhelmed me.

Julene's Psalm (Fall 1991)

You, O Lord are my strength, my hope and my joy!
When I am burdened and weary and the world is closing in on me;
When exhaustion overwhelms me and problems weigh me down;
You, O Lord are my strength!
I will call upon You and You will answer me.

You, O Lord are my strength, my hope and my joy!
When temptation overcomes me and sin is victorious over me;
When my toil gains nothing and all seems to be against me;
You, O Lord are my hope!
I will call upon You and You will answer me.

You, O Lord are my strength, my hope and my joy!
When I can not see tomorrow, as things are not going my way today;
When the waves of discouragement, sorrow and grief wash over me;
You, O Lord are my joy!
I will call upon You and You will answer me.

Without You, O Lord, I am nothing;
Without You my life is meaningless.
I will praise Your holy and precious name O Most High God;
You’re my strength, my hope, my joy…
My life!

- By Julene Renee Olson

Why the Crocodile?

That's my personal logo. If I ever got a tattoo, that's what it would be.
In Lugandan, a native Ugandan language, a crocodile is called a goonya (pronounced gōn-ee-a). I visited Uganda in 1998 on a missions trip to build an orphanage. It was an amazing trip. Due to my stubbornness on-site and my obsession with the crocodiles on the Nile river, I came back with the nickname goonya. On our river safari, we came across a huge Nile crocodile lying on the banks of the river. There were so many crocodiles and the ones sunning themselves on the bank would slide quickly into the water as our boat approached but not this big old fella. As we pulled up to the river bank where he lay, he didn't move. Then we saw the large bloody gash across his tail and the twine wrapped tightly around the upper part of his jaw, digging into his flesh and looking as though it had been there awhile. We pulled up right beside him. He was less than 6 feet from the small boat we were in. His eyes were open and he didn't move. It was unbelievable. He may not have been alive or he may have been too weak to move, but he lay still as we sat awed by this massive creature. That night we stayed at a Nile river camp and as I walked back to my cabin I heard rustling in the grasses on the banks of the river in front of my balcony. I looked to see what it was and I saw 3 small crocodile "toddlers" rushing through the grass and eventually back into the safety of the river. Unbelievable.

As I thought about it, I decided I want to be like a goonya in my life, with my passions and beliefs. When a crocodile locks onto something with his huge teeth and powerful jaws, he holds on for dear life. He'll drag and pull and twist and turn until that thing is his and no matter how much struggle he has to go through, he will continue to hold on. Life is a struggle and so many times we get tangled up in the distractions like a fishing rope or get injured from a passing motor boat or a personal attack. It is so easy to lose your grip on what you know is truth and what you know is truly important. I have done that many times and I don't want to anymore. Through everything there has been one constant truth and no matter how far I may have gotten pulled from it, I always come back to this fact. God and His promises are real and my soul longs for Him and for His life and I can't be satisfied by anything else. God is good, He is faithful and He is with me. God loved me so much that He sent His Son Jesus Christ to earth, to die and rise again in victory over sin and death so that I can have this eternal life, to give me this hope, to live a full life in Him. No matter what is thrown at me, I want to hold on to what I know is truth and I don't want to let go.

There are 2 verses in the Bible that have become my motto with this logo although there are many that speak of this particular concept:



"HOLD FAST to the hope you profess, for He who promised is faithful." Heb 10:23

"This day... I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, that you may live, that you may love the Lord your God, listen to His voice and HOLD FAST to Him. For the Lord is your life."
Deuteronomy 30:19-21a

I also don't want to let go of those things that I know I am called to do and those things I am passionate about. It gets hard and all the activities of life often drain your time and energy. In my time with God, my time in prayer, my marriage, my writing, my study, my time spent encouraging others to grab hold and not let go, in these things I want to be a like a goonya.